Blurry love.

In case you didn’t get the memo from corporate America, Valentine’s Day is tomorrow. We don’t have a lot of cash right now, so I’m just doing something handmade and personal for my husband. Other than that, it will be a pretty average Friday around here.

I took a picture the other night of Henry running back and forth on the couch (and giving his poor mother a heart attack). He’s blurry in it, but our wedding photo on the wall behind him is kinda almost in focus. At first, I thought it was a bad picture, but I kept going back to it. I sort of loved it. Then I realized that I loved it so much because all of my favorite life moments, and people, are in that picture. That’s our family! My family! We made this little person! This climbing, running, crazy little person! Even though we all learned about human reproduction in the 6th grade, it’s still a little amazing to me that we produced life and that I’m someone’s mom now.

So I post it here, for Valentine’s Day, the technically bad photograph that represents our love. I hope you all celebrate the love in your life tomorrow. Happy V-Day!

love

11 months.

Honestly? Where does the time go? I can’t believe I have this almost-toddler now. Henry’s already walking (pretty well too) and eating all the foods (except no peanut butter, honey, or strawberries yet before you become concerned). His new favorite food is apple. I peel one and then chop it into bite-size pieces. He goes nuts for it. Anyway, I just can’t believe that he’s not this little, sedentary baby anymore. And even though things aren’t super great at our house right how, Henry makes everything better. He’s hilarious and smart and charming. I start getting bummed and maybe even let a tear or two fall, and then I look at my baby and remember how lucky I am. Truly, truly blessed. It doesn’t hurt that he loves snuggles and he loves giving kisses. Talk about heart-warmer.

I could go on and on about how amazing I think he is, but I’ll spare you….until his one year post, then you’re in for it.

And if you have some extra prayers or love to send, we could use them right now.

I’ll leave with this picture taken on his 11 month bday. My baby growing up.

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Curveballs and learning to walk.

Oh, how quickly things can change in life. Just when I thought things were finally going my way and I was comfortable for the first time maybe ever, life threw a curveball. I won’t (can’t) go into details, but I will say it’s times like these that remind me of what’s truly important. Things like my healthy and happy baby boy (who is now WALKING at almost 11 months old), a loving husband, and amazing family and friends. I can’t believe the outpouring of support and love I received from the few people I confided in, but it humbles me. It really made the initial shock of what happened much easier to bear and helped me focus on the positive.

I will share what’s going on in the near future, but for now, check out Henry walking. He’s also talking more saying “nana” for his favorite food banana, mama, dada, bye bye, night night, no no, baba (he says this for the actual bottle and also when he’s just hungry. He’ll point to his high chair and say “baba.” If I say, “are you hungry, do you want some dinner?” He’ll say “baba!!” and make his way to the kitchen.)

This video is a few days old. He’s a lot more stable now and even doing a little bit of running, which is fun (not really).

Lucky Number 7

Henry turned 7 months old yesterday, and I’m an awful mother for not writing a blog post on the actual day but oh well. Now that he’s much more mobile and animated, he keeps me busy. Also, yesterday I took a few hours off to do what I wanted to do. Of course that means I mainly cleaned and made baby food, but I also took a long shower and watched a movie while my mom babysat. I’ve been kind of in a funk, so it was just what I needed.

But before I took any kind of break, I took his 7 month picture with the ever-shrinking Yoda. The baby also got to my sign and tried to eat it before I could place it next to him, but I was able to wrangle it out of his clenched fists for a few seconds.

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He went through the mother of all growth spurts recently, just eating non-stop when he wasn’t sleeping. The kid even woke up TWICE during the night for a few days to eat, which is something he hasn’t done since he was maybe 2 months old? Six weeks old? Somewhere around there. He’s back to normal now, thank you God, and sleeping through the night again. I’ve also upped his solid food consumption from twice a day to thrice a day, so maybe that had a hand in the return to normalcy.

Here are some other fun things he’s doing:

  • Crawling (he’s perfected the army crawl, but he gets on those hands and knees and rocks enthusiastically. I think real crawl is imminent.)
  • Pulling himself up
  • Fake Sneezing
  • Using some of those hard “g” sounds: goo, gee, gah, etc.
  • Eating a lot of real food and much bigger chunks. Also getting good at picking up food and making it into the mouth.
  • Standing while holding onto the table. He even walked down it a little bit this morning to get my husband’s glasses. He fell over after that, but still.
  • Just general funniness and sweetness

I’m going to be checking out baby music classes in the next week or so for him. Henry LOVES when we sing him songs and dance for him. I figure this will be a great way to have fun and stimulate his mind. I’m looking forward to the social time myself, to be honest.

Nothing too new in our world except we are in the midst of trying to purchase a home. The bank is taking its sweet time in approving us, and we have about 6 weeks until our lease is up. Not stressful or anything. Worst case scenario is we rent a house for a year or so, but either way, we are out of this apartment and onto bigger kitchens and more spacious living rooms.

Off to put a little monster down for his nap. Til next month! (Kidding. I hope.)

Nerd training in progress.

Henry is fighting a nap right now, so while he’s jumping until he passes out (here’s to hoping), I’m actually on a computer and thought I’d do a quick picture post.

We took him to his first Comic Expo this weekend. My husband has his own online comic and of course, loves comic books, so we had to go. I’m really glad we went, even though it was super crowded and not suited for a stroller, but it was still fun. Also, the ABQ Comic Con is like 1/100th the size of SoCal’s or NYC’s or…most of the other ones. Here’s a quick re-cap.

Henry slept for the first 30-40 minutes, which astonished me because it was LOUD up in there. There was this announcer guy whose voiced boomed across the arena. If you were talking to someone at a table when this dude started talking, you just had to wait. It was that loud.

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When he woke up, we decided to just carry him around so he could take it all in. We went to the Mouse Guard booth and boy, did they love Henry. They even tweeted  out his picture!

Screen Shot 2013-06-24 at 10.48.55 AMWe ended up buying that book for him, too.

After some more walking and talking, it was time for a break. We spotted some chairs in the corner of the convention center and sat down to feed the monster. My husband also won extra points by taking Henry into the men’s room to change him. One of the original Power Rangers was in there at the same time, which was cool? I guess.

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After that, I decided to let Chris go get his nerd on solo and walked Henry around the permitter where it was less claustrophobic. After two hours of extreme stimulation, he had enough. Shoes came off, shade came down, eyes closed.

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He’s a good little companion.

 

Going places.

A friend of mine suggested I write a blog about prepping for outings with the baby. I hope this doesn’t read obnoxious, especially because I am by no means an expert on anything much less motherhood and/or babies. This is just merely what works for me now. It will change and grow right along with Henry. But maybe it well help some anxious new mothers like I was/am/always will be. All you more veteran mothers, please leave any other tips for traveling with baby, especially flying, which I have to do later this year. Across the country. NERVOUS.

When I first had Henry, the thought of even taking him to the grocery store by myself gave me dry heaves. But over time, and with experience, I’m not afraid to take him anywhere anymore. Not even quiet museums. Been there, done that. Plus, I have to leave the house for my own sanity. I’ve decided that in order to combat this postpartum anxiety I’ve been suffering, I have to live life. I have to keep doing things I like to do and just incorporating baby into that. Otherwise, I’ll probably descend into depression and no one wants that. Or maybe someone wants that, but I do not. It’s easy taking Henry places anyway. It’s all a matter of preparation.

Tip number one: Get a huge diaper bag (or in my case, a very oversized purse). I do not believe you can over pack when you have a baby. I’d also suggest keeping a stash of diapers/wipes/change of clothes in your car, just in case. When we went to Santa Fe, I packed everything but his crib. Sound machines, several blankets, medications (just in case), and even a rectal thermometer. Don’t judge me! If he had a fever, I doubt concierge at the hotel would have a rectal therm handy, ok?

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A lot of things stay in the diaper bag permanently: baby wipes, boogies wipes, sunscreen, socks, a onesie (I switch them out occasionally), a hand sanitizer (or two – yes, I’m a little compulsive), extra pacifiers, and baby sunglasses. I just replenish the diaper supply and add a bib, burp cloth, toys, extra set of clothes, and food. When my mom is babysitting, I put his entire tub of formula and a bottle in the bag (along with some baby food – peas are pictured below). When we’re going out somewhere, I’ll put together a couple bottles (powder only) and bring a couple bottles of water. I’ve yet to have to feed him in public. We try to feed him before we leave, which gives us a good 3-4 solid hours before he’s hungry again.

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Honestly, getting myself ready before we leave the house is more challenging. This morning, I laid him on the floor so I could rinse off very quickly in the shower. I can’t lay him on any sort of elevated surface anymore because he flips onto his tummy and heads for the edge quickly. Because I stopped and decided to fold and put away a mountain of laundry, I also didn’t have time to put on makeup. Oh well. My boss doesn’t care and I don’t have any other co-workers so screw it.

photo 3Oh, hey Matt Lauer.

photo 4Mama and little boogs. 

Putting Henry in the car seat takes about 32 seconds and then we’re out the door! Don’t forget his toys or he’ll let you know about it. Loudly.

photo 5“Like, seriously? Stop taking my picture for a second. Just a second. Please.”

And look, all babies are different and have varying temperaments. I realize I have a kid who doesn’t fuss too much, which makes it easier. He likes to just take in the sites and is content to just sit back and look around for long periods of time. If he wasn’t this way, who knows. I’d probably stay home a lot more. But either way, it’s good to try it out. See how they act at restaurants (pick a noisy family restaurant for your first trip). You’ll probably be surprised.

I’m going to enjoy it now before he’s a toddler and throwing grade-A tantrums in public. Not too excited about that.

Portable blogging.

I guess I am going to start writing blogs on the iPhone/iPad from now on. Otherwise, I might never blog again. With the exception of my new part-time job, I am never on a computer. And with a baby who can no longer sit in a bouncer without trying to escape and on the verge of crawling, it will get infinitely more difficult. Let’s see how this goes. Autocorrect, don’t you screw this up for me!

Henry is changing every day. It’s amazing. Babbling, scooting, acrobatics, eating A LOT, sleeping all the way through the night (8 pm – 6 am), sitting on his own pretty well, and just generally doing more stuff. I look at him in his high chair and think, “whoa. I have a baby.”

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Working a few hours a week and getting out of the house has done a world of good for my anxiety. I’m starting to feel like the old Katy again. It also helps that my hair is growing back quickly from that pesky postpartum hair loss episode. I’ve also lost 6 pounds in the past week from eating less sugar, mainly. But my cravings for anything sweet are KILLING me. Wish me strength.

There are the crappy days too, where I think I don’t know what the eff I’m doing. Today was one of those days. I decided to make Chris a nice dinner and after putting the boiled potatoes into the kitchenaid mixer and turning it on to make mashed potatoes, the potatoes went a-flying. All over the kitchen. Meltdown ensued. I’m laughing about it now, but I was not then. I had just fed Henry so he was fussing to get down (also turned out he had a full diaper) which didn’t help my nerves. Chris came home and calmed me down (he’s good at that) and the evening resumed as normal. But I wonder how moms with multiple children do it? How will I ever get a meal cooked or clean a room when we have another one? Anyway, my meatloaf came out great, so it worked out. I’ll get the hang of it by the time Henry’s in college, at least. Maybe.

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Trying to escape and getting side tracked by his toes.

Mi Vida Excitante.

Babies are so fickle.

I tell you that he’s rolled over from tummy to back, and he did — twice! But now he won’t do it again for me. It’s like he knows I have my iPhone camera ready or something. Jeez. Also, the next taste of avocado, he didn’t seem to mind (reference below pictures — sorry for the blurry one, I was dodging avocado puree). But the next morning? Back to screaming. Maybe it’s more of a dinner food.

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One thing has remained consistent and that’s his easy bedtime. He still falls asleep on his own. Tonight, he was talking to himself until he fell asleep. Chris and I got a kick out of that one and couldn’t stop giggling. Please Lord, if you read my blog, let this be something that continues forever and ever and ever. Sleep is not something I mess around with.

BUT wait. Now he wakes up at around 1 – 1:30 am. No, not to eat. To get in bed with mom. It’s like clockwork and it’s probably my fault. But hey, like I said, I like my sleep. So if it means putting him (safely) beside me so we can get a few more hours, then I’m gonna do it. Surprisingly, I sleep great when he’s in bed with me so it’s not horrible.

This week will be a busy one. The in-laws are coming into town for a few days, which means lots of trips to Costco! And next Monday is Henry’s 4 month well-baby check and round 2 of immunizations. I am so not ready for that.

But look, he can read! The doctor will be UH-MAZED! Ok not really. But I love the serious look on his face like he’s concentrating. He closed it and put it in his mouth 4.2 seconds later.

henryreadsMom knows this book by heart.

In case anyone’s ever noticed his birthmark on his forehead, it’s called a stork bite. Henry’s is in the shape of a “V”, which I say is for victory. It’s a shame that it’s not lightning shaped. That would spice up our afternoons.

Sooo yeah. That’s my exciting life.

Finding emo.

Last Friday, I woke up exhausted. It was because I had been crying almost all day Thursday. A distant relative passed away last week and that had me all introspective and crap. I look at Henry and Chris and I get all emotional because I know how lucky I am. My life is exactly how I want it to be and I never want it to end. That’s what made me so sad and emo. But, I took some long naps this weekend and have vowed not to cry over that crap again.

I wrote briefly last week about letting some things go that hurt my feelings. It’s always much easier said than done, but it’s got to happen. For my sanity. I hold things in and hold things in and then days like Thursday happen. In any relationship, there has got to be a give and take. I refuse to have demands put upon me without any semblance of reciprocation any more. People want so much from me, but aren’t willing to give. This ends in me feeling used and confused. (Rhymes!) Where do I go from there? Continue to be that person and be miserable for the sake of a one-sided relationship or let go and be happy? I’ll choose the latter. I have to. As hard as it might be.

I saw this quote the other day and it’s like a light bulb went off:

“The mental and physical space we create by letting go of things that belong in our past gives us…the option to fill the space with something new.” – Susan Fay West

My energies are better used on my son, my marriage, my family, and those friends that are there for me. And I’m lucky that I have a few of those. This new found positive energy will also be put toward a re-design my blog (I finally got Adobe DesignSuite last night!), looking for freelance writing jobs, and having a FUN summer with Henry and Chris. I’m really looking forward to it.

I promise I won’t post a bunch of emotional, sad sap blogs. This is it. Forever. Ok, for a long time. I’m done.

And to exit on a happy note, here is Henry with his Grandma today. Have I mentioned that this kid LOOOOOVES his grandma? He does.

henrygmaphotoYeah, my energy belongs RIGHT HERE.

 

 

 

Spring.

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Today was such a pretty day. We couldn’t let it go to waste, so we took Henry to the botanical gardens and aquarium. I’ve mentioned before that he has a great attention span, but honestly we could have sat there for an hour (and we would have except the crowds were annoying me). He followed one fish around the entire tank, never taking his adorable eyes off of him. Then a shark came to the glass and he flinched, but then kept on watching.

I think this is going to be our summer hang out.